Munchyn

I’d like to introduce you all to someone very dear to my heart. Someone with whom I have shared laughter and tears, triumph and heartbreak, the dizzying highs and terrifying lows of this crazy life, here, in the 21st Century.

This is Munchyn.

She is 24 years old and lives in Toronto. She’s 5’8’’ and describes her body type as ‘average.’

Almost a year ago this shy and timid young lady was told of a free online dating site called plenty of fish(LINK) from her friend Rhonda. Intrigued, and ready to reenter the dating scene after a 6 year high school relationship ended in heartbreak, she created a profile.

A perusal of Munchyn’s information provides a startling insight into the mind of a young woman in the midst of a quarter-life crisis. She openly admits to being a heavy drinker (> 3 times a week) and to using drugs “occasionally.” Her job, listed starkly as “data entry”, looms above her admission that although she posses “some college” education, she has never finished. Perhaps this is some lifelong dream of hers, to graduate, to escape from the perpetual emissions of her monitor, but she leaves no further clues to her ambitions.

Her interest are listed simply: Jeopardy, photography, making soap, a mid-range brand of gin, and seasonal tubing. When ones interests match up to another user on the service that interest becomes a link. The ‘seasonal tubing’ interest remains linkless.

The pervasive feeling throughout the page is one of a desperate loneliness- of a young woman straining at the confines of single life, yet too shy to make any real attempt beyond this sophomore effort. Her ‘About Me’ and ‘First Date’ sections, the one opportunity she has to express herself free of the limitations of a drop-down box and multiple choice options, are the epitome of 21st century timidness. The pervasiveness of ‘LOL’ and ‘uhm’ is cringe-worthy, and her lack of commitment to even basic punctuation is almost as telling as her stream-of-consciousness diversion into Canada’s Wonderland ticket policies.

However, he appreciation for Ryan Reynolds notwithstanding (Though who can blame her), buried beneath it all is a truly magical-sounding first date. Perhaps, trapped within this nearly crushed flower, is a true romantic begging to be swept off her feet. Or at least snuggled.

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